Suwandi

Category: Funny

  • Ladies Night?


    I am browsing askmen.com (i visit this website a lot lately). It’s an online male magazine. Today, there’s an article “Ladies Night: Sexist?“. A (funny) guy sued a club in NY because that club providing free drinks to ladies on Ladies Night, he thought it was a discrimination!! :)) Funny, isn’t he? Read the article below.

    Roy Den Hollander, a New York City man, is suing the popular nightclubs Lotus, AER Lounge and China Club for their participation in the practice of ladies’ night. These clubs routinely offer free drinks and/or admittance to members of the fairer sex (hence the name, “ladies’ night”) and Den Hollander claims that this discriminates against men.

    Den Hollander’s lawyer states that ladies’ night violates the Constitution and he is seeking minor damages. While lawyers on the other side claim that if Roy wins his case, then other specials will need to be abolished, such as the “early bird special” that only seniors can take advantage of and “children eat for free” that only kids under 5 can have.

    What Den Hollander and his lawyer don’t realize is that ladies’ night isn’t about women, it’s about men. See, ladies’ night does attract women with its free booze, which is a service to men looking for more fish in the sea.

  • Mafia ’10 Commandments’ Found – TIME

    Thou shalt be faithful to the Mafia.

    Italian police said Thursday they have found a list of 10 commandments for mobsters in a house near Palermo, where a top Mafia boss was arrested this week.

    Salvatore Lo Piccolo, who had been on the run since 1993, was vying to become the next “boss of bosses” of the Sicilian Mafia, according to Italian investigators. He was apprehended Monday by police raiding a house in the countryside outside Palermo, the Sicilian capital.

    The list was found among his coded notes about the administration of Cosa Nostra that were delivered by Lo Piccolo’s aides. Police in Palermo said that the list opened with a preamble that said: “I swear to be faithful to Cosa Nostra. Should I betray, my flesh will burn.”

    Under the category “Rights and Duty” were the 10 entries, meant to be a sort of users’ manual for the good mobster.

    The list was typewritten in uppercase letters, police said.
    Italian newspaper La Repubblica published a photo of what it said was the list, under the headline: “The Godfather’s Ten Commandments.”
    The list bars mobsters from hanging out in bars, from befriending police and being late for appointments. It also bars them from “taking possession of money that belong to others or other families.”

    Somehow make you want to create your own Commandments 🙂 And, understanding mafioso, you can see they always treat women very well, several commandments also found in the list.

    “You shall not look at wives of our friends,” says one entry. “You shall respect your wife,” says another. However, the Mafia comes first, as the fifth “commandment” orders a mobster to “be available for Cosa Nostra at any moment, even if your wife is about to give birth.”

    The last part of the list sets out application rules, saying that those who have a very bad behavior and no moral values cannot join.

  • Flight Attendant

    “According to civil aviation regulation, bla bla bla bla…., enjoy your flight!”

    We hear that everytime we’re flying with commercial airline, i never pay any attention to the stewardess, it’s kinda boring and they’re not really trying to do something for you, they’re not teaching or educate you about how to use the emergency equipments, the only reason they do the point this point that is only requirements.

    Do they ever ask us, “so,..do you understand?”, or “do you want us to repeat this?”. No! They talk, show, but assume all the ‘audience’ understand.

    And, on my last month flight from Jakarta to Surabaya, after the plane had landed smoothly, the flight attendants said “Para penumpang yang terhormat, kita telah mendarat di Bandara Internasional Juanda, dimohon untuk tetap duduk, sekali lagi dimohon untuk tetap duduk, hingga pesawat benar-benar berhenti dengan sempurna dan lampu bla bla…”.

    Normal? Later, they continued with English version “Ladies and gentlements, we’ve just landed in Juanda International Airport, please remain seated until the plane bla bla..”

    See? Why they have to repeat the ‘remain-seated’ part in Bahasa Indonesia, but none in English. Is that Indonesian so stupid that can not understand that they need to remain seated? I asked my self. They must not do the discrimination, indonesian will also understand to remain seated without the words being emphasized!

    I was wrong, and the flight attendants was right. Even, they have asked twice, all the passengers still unbuckle their seatbelt and reach their luggage, whilethe plane’s still moving… Sad but true, most of us not ‘clever’ enough.

  • Third Type

    There are three types of people in this world:
    those who make things happen,
    those who watch things happen,
    and those who wonder what happened.
    Mary Kay Ash

    I think i’m 10% “number 1”, 40 “number 2”, and 50% “number 3” :p Haha.
    Anyway, there’s nothing wrong being the number one, number two, or number three, right? Which one are you?

  • Trick

    Do you remember when you were about junior/senior high school, we used to put a written paper like ‘Aku Orang Gila’, or whatever, behind the back of our friends?
    Do you remember when we were about that age, we like to put gum on a bench, so the next person sat there will ‘suffer’?

    Do you remember all those tricks?

    And now, ask your friends, who was not at the same school or not lived in the same town. Mostly, they did the same tricks too!! And, i wonder HOW. We had no internet connection to check what tricks students in Jakarta have or Surabaya have, or etc. But amazingly, we’re all using the same tricks! Nobody teached nobody. Nobody spread the tricks to all the school in Indonesia. So, how?

    Any explanation?